文書(shū)寫作 | 美國大(dà)學的why school 怎麽寫才能脫穎而出？

發布日期：2021-08-16 浏覽次數：198

大(dà)家好，我(wǒ)(wǒ)是朗汀汀，一(yī)個有态度的留學過來人。

在申請美國留學或者英國留學時，都會要回答一(yī)個why school的内容。

什麽叫why school？顧名思義就是要回答：爲什麽想申請這所大(dà)學？

提問方式大(dà)多都是why choose XXX, 也偶爾會問到when did you know XXX。萬變不離(lí)其宗，回答這類提問，最主要是爲了展現申請者對學校的了解程度，比如價值觀，教育理念，特色專業等等。

所以問題來了：如何簡單明了的回答why school的問題？

今天汀姐整理了幾個案例，一(yī)位申請波士頓大(dà)學的文書(shū)，兩位申請西北(běi)大(dà)學的文書(shū)以及一(yī)位申請紐約大(dà)學的文書(shū)，對于這四位學生(shēng)的文書(shū)，汀姐是如何修改的，感興趣的同學可以繼續往下(xià)閱讀。

第一(yī)部分(fēn)：學校爲什麽要問 why school ？

第二部分(fēn)：四位申請美國大(dà)學的案例分(fēn)析

第三部分(fēn)：如何簡明扼要回答 why school ？

學校爲什麽要問 why school ？

很多學生(shēng)們在看到這個問題的時候往往會一(yī)臉懵逼，内心甚至還有點不能接受：我(wǒ)(wǒ)花了這麽多時間研究你們學校，準備申請材料，還交了申請費(fèi)，這還不足以表達我(wǒ)(wǒ)的誠意嗎(ma)？

很難說。學校爲什麽會問 why school這個問題？因爲每個學校都希望自己錄取的學生(shēng)是對學校滿意的，在學校期間是收獲滿滿的，離(lí)開(kāi)學校之後還能不斷向别人推薦的。

基于以上這幾點，我(wǒ)(wǒ)可以展開(kāi)來多說一(yī)說。

衡量你對學校的興趣度

美國很多大(dà)學申請時都競争相當激烈，而學校在選擇那些優秀學生(shēng)時，考慮了很多因素。在GPA、标化成績，活動經曆、推薦信等水平相差無幾的情況下(xià)，學校會更傾向于錄取對它有濃厚興趣的學生(shēng)。

匹配度

每所大(dà)學都希望錄取的學生(shēng)給到offer之後能确定入學，并且在入學期間每天都是收獲滿滿的，而不希望學生(shēng)入學後讀了一(yī)段時間就離(lí)開(kāi)學校。畢竟學生(shēng)的畢業率和留存率也是後期招生(shēng)宣傳很重要的材料。

你要在why school中(zhōng)表現出：我(wǒ)(wǒ)通過大(dà)量的research後發現，我(wǒ)(wǒ)要研究的program隻有你們學校能給到我(wǒ)(wǒ)想要的！這是一(yī)個考驗雙方匹配度的關鍵點。

所以，綜上幾個方面，申請者如何回答 why school 這個問題非常關鍵！

具體(tǐ)案例分(fēn)析

從我(wǒ)(wǒ)的經驗來看，很多學生(shēng)都輕視這個問題，覺得這沒什麽好說的，甚至不覺得需要花濃墨重彩去(qù)描述這個問題。我(wǒ)(wǒ)敢肯定，有大(dà)多數的學生(shēng)花在這個問題上的時間都不及個人文書(shū)的十分(fēn)之一(yī)。但事實上，這個問題在文書(shū)中(zhōng)所占的比重并不低。

下(xià)面，我(wǒ)(wǒ)就給大(dà)家舉幾個例子，逐個分(fēn)析。

以下(xià)例文均爲學生(shēng)原版，未經改動

學生(shēng)1：申請波士頓大(dà)學

I want to study at a reputed university, with a stimulating environment as I have always lived in major cities where I can go to cafes, to hear music, to museums and sports events as part of my everyday life. Boston University has become one of the best in the US; it has top professors and is located in the middle of a historic city, and accessible to everything. It has a strong international relations program which would be perfect for me since I have attended a diverse international school. I noticed all these things when I visited. Given Boston University’s notable reputation and history, I would be excited by the opportunity to attend such a strong and knowledgeable institution . . .

學生(shēng)1最終拿到波士頓大(dà)學的錄取了麽？

這位學生(shēng)的回答幾乎可以用在每一(yī)所大(dà)型的、城市地區的學校，中(zhōng)規中(zhōng)矩，沒有特别之處。如果我(wǒ)(wǒ)作爲招生(shēng)官：

我(wǒ)(wǒ)能相信她是用心選擇，認真思考才選擇我(wǒ)(wǒ)的學校的麽？

我(wǒ)(wǒ)能從這個學生(shēng)的回答中(zhōng)看出她其他申請材料中(zhōng)所沒有體(tǐ)現的東西麽？

回答是：不能。

Boston

說學生(shēng)1的回答中(zhōng)規中(zhōng)矩，還算是褒義詞了，不客氣的說，學生(shēng)1在回答why school時用詞籠統概括，毫無新意：波士頓大(dà)學名聲顯赫，位于曆史悠久的城市，從音樂會到圖書(shū)館，資(zī)源豐富，有國際關系專業。這些東西百度上都有，大(dà)家都知(zhī)道，招生(shēng)官也很清楚這些隻不過是尋常爾爾，并沒有提及波士頓大(dà)學的特别之處。

除此之外(wài)，學生(shēng)1在文中(zhōng)寫道：“來自一(yī)所學生(shēng)非常多樣的國際學校”，這方面的信息學校在通用表格裏早就知(zhī)道了，不能顯示出更多關于自己的特色部分(fēn)。

波士頓大(dà)學每年收到數萬份申請，而軟硬背景優秀的更是數不勝數，這樣一(yī)份普通而平凡的回答，真的能拿到offer麽？

學生(shēng)2：申請西北(běi)大(dà)學

The most unique trait of Northwestern University is its focus on undergraduate research. I am very interested in biology and chemistry; I just love working in laboratories. In the “Gymnasium”, the Swiss pre-university school, we were often confronted with a problem that we had to solve in groups. Such problems could be as easy as distinguishing water from ethanol, or as complex as building a hydrogen fuel cell. To find a solution we were given time in our laboratory and could ask for practically anything we needed . . .

A further very good quality of Northwestern University is its rather high rank and great reputation. I seek a good education and definitely appreciate it, if the university I attend is renowned. If I went to a second-rank college I would be better off studying in Switzerland . . .

A last point is the location: It’s just great; right next to the lake, in the nice and cosy town of Evanston. You have the advantages of a small town, such as lots of greenery and a quiet environment, and yet Chicago is very close and accessible . . .

學生(shēng)3：申請西北(běi)大(dà)學

Because I intend to pursue a career in photojournalism, I see the Medill School of Journalism as the Holy Grail of education. Offering the impressive intellectual and technical resources of a prestigious research university, Northwestern would provide me the confidence of knowing that I would be getting the most forward-focused education in journalism.. . . The quarter system and Medill’s internship requirements create an ideal confluence for exactly that experience . . .

Northwestern has a gorgeous location. When I visited the campus, I was smitten with Evanston’s cozy feel. Although I initially pictured myself in the heart of a city, Evanston eclipsed this vision. The small town environment is comforting without being limiting, offering plenty of cafés, restaurants, and shops to explore . . . Meanwhile, Northwestern’s scenic lakeside location is the perfect retreat for studying or relaxing . . .

Brimming with enthusiasm, Northwestern has infectious school spirit. Because I assume leaving home after eighteen years will be difficult, I count on school pride to bring me a sense of community and belonging. From the famed painted rock to the fountain spewing purple water, the robust loyalty to the university captures my heart . . . In short, Northwestern is my dream school because it embodies everything I value: journalism, incomparable internship opportunities, dance, and an inspiring atmosphere . . .

學生(shēng)4：申請紐約大(dà)學

這篇文章，在Parke Muth的博客中(zhōng)也可以找到。

I’m done being a New Yorker born and raised in sheltered suburbia — I’m ready to get slapped in the face by the unforgiving hand of NYC and to become a true Noo Yawk-ah. While not an accurate representation of what all NYU students think, the NYU Secrets Facebook page constantly posts the thoughts of NYU students resenting the bittersweet independence of such a large, non-traditional school, but at the same time falling in love with the knowledgeable and nurturing faculty and classes.

I’m done dancing around on the outskirts of the arena — I’m ready to plop myself right into the frenzied mist of action. No walls insulate NYU from the sprawling labyrinth of NYC, which is ideal for a unique and exciting college experience . . .

另外(wài)三個學生(shēng)的回答怎麽樣？

這三篇文書(shū)要比第一(yī)篇多很多細節，更有說服力，結果也顯而易見是不同的，學生(shēng)1被拒（意料之中(zhōng)），而學生(shēng)2、學生(shēng)3、學生(shēng)4都被錄取了。我(wǒ)(wǒ)們來仔細看一(yī)看他們的回答，分(fēn)析一(yī)下(xià)。

注意：在學生(shēng)2和學生(shēng)3同樣都是申請西北(běi)大(dà)學，雖然申請季不同，但在文中(zhōng)都提到了幾個一(yī)樣的東西：湖，咖啡館，舒适的氛圍。

學生(shēng)1在他的回答中(zhōng)講了自己的經曆，卻沒有說是什麽吸引他到那所學校。也就是說，他沒有展示出自己對學校的興趣。

雖然說在回答中(zhōng)講一(yī)講學校的校園環境，位置等等并不是壞事，但是要想到每年都有成千上萬的學生(shēng)給出同樣的回答。

雖然各大(dà)院校都極力的宣傳自己，但是你不能機械地在你的申請中(zhōng)重複這些内容，浪費(fèi)你申請材料的寶貴空間，尤其是你字數有限的時候。學生(shēng)2和3都提到了學校排名和聲望，但是都與自己的申請目标和計劃結合了起來。相比之下(xià)，學生(shēng)1的語言太蒼白(bái)無力。

Washington square park

所以在回答“爲什麽”的時候，你的答案一(yī)定要字字珠玑，字字走心。

好的Why school是重點很明确的，你寫的第一(yī)條，一(yī)定是你最看重的點。比如一(yī)個申請人是在商(shāng)業銀行工(gōng)作，職業目标是在商(shāng)業銀行做general management。那他寫Why school第一(yī)條就不應該是finance club，而是選擇這個學校是因爲這是一(yī)個很好的general management school，學校整體(tǐ)的項目設置是如何讓自己從課程到leaderhsip的實踐都能很好的鍛煉的。其次才是finance行業的connection等等。這個就是他自己的優先級。

如何簡明扼要回答 why school ？

就像汀姐在上文所說，回答這個問題一(yī)定要字字珠玑，字字走心。下(xià)面汀姐給大(dà)家支幾招：幾要幾不要。

不要做：

不要說學校的名聲或者排名。

學校的排名和名聲大(dà)家都是有目共睹的，寫這些無畏的虛名隻會浪費(fèi)申請費(fèi)。因爲太過多餘，太蒼白(bái)無力，太沒有說服力。

不要講學校的創始人。

作爲招生(shēng)官，自己學校的創校史以及出過哪些名人，想必他比你清楚得多了，所以不要花無謂的筆墨去(qù)做多餘的提醒。

要做的：

一(yī)定要搞清楚自己到底爲什麽要申請這所大(dà)學。

基于學校能給你提供什麽，有哪些是符合你的預期的，一(yī)定要想明白(bái)，你的需求到底是什麽。

一(yī)定要有主次之分(fēn)。

我(wǒ)(wǒ)常常看到一(yī)些申請人的why school上來就說你們有個特别好的俱樂部。或者一(yī)上來就會說校友非常好，或者你們的項目很好。就會讓人很疑惑，難道你是沖着一(yī)個課外(wài)俱樂部來讀這個書(shū)的麽？難道校友很友善你就爲此花了這麽多錢和兩年的時間來到這裏麽？